Summer solstice is now only forty days away. But spring here still has a ways to go. The birds may be singing, and the seasonal clothes may be lighter, but the leaves and buds are still in their early stages.
So, the last time I hit the trail near the house, on the day Maine-native Anna Kendrick’s Scrappy Little Nobody was scheduled to be released, I discovered another path connected to the large clearing. The first time I visited the clearing, it was starting to get dark (around sunset, plus rain) and I was only passing through, so I missed this path.
The precipitation had begun to pick up again Tuesday, so I put on my L.L. Bean cap. There was a noticeable decline in elevation, before hitting a split… or fork. Or…
There may be an infinite number of things we can do or ways to do them in life, but we only walk the paths we are ready to walk. We are not meant to walk them all. Or even see them all.
Sometimes we can become so buried in our work that we lose parts of the big picture. We can busy ourselves to exhaustion or pretend to avoid confrontation or danger (such as having a smartphone in front of us, or earbuds in to bore others), or to avoid pain… But life isn’t meant to be lived in a bubble. We are meant to feel, and do what scares us every now and then. We aren’t ants or plants; we are human beings.
Now, if there’s anyone who’s lived under a rock, it’s me. And I mean, I have nothing, nada, zip figured out from experience. The main reason why I can’t really write a novel is because my own living story is so empty. I am Exhibit A for someone who hasn’t done anything with his life.
However, since 2012, I have opened up to opportunity quite a bit. …Of course my methods have been awful as opportunity most always doesn’t return my calls. I’ve been reaching out to strangers, sometimes with my heart on my sleeve. Lots of failure.
Still, the people I’ve met these past four years have changed my life in ways big and small. I’m trying new things, attempting to socialize more, even if the results are not great. The Saturday group, for example— I learned things I couldn’t have possibly learned not going. Continue reading Paths undiscovered→
With so many trees, come so many leaves in the fall. And varying shades of blue from the bluish rain clouds are seen in the water collected on such leaves.
Because it was raining Thursday, I didn’t expect anyone to be out. That helped as far as my courage went, in case I actually was trespassing… Our southern neighbor kids (now adults) have driven small vehicles down this path. Now, from all the seasonal winds, there are plenty of fallen branches to dodge. And, like the woods at Crescent Beach park, some of the ground was mushy.
Half past five, the sun was setting, and… it was my first time down this way, so I didn’t catch any small clearing areas along the path. (I wasn’t really paying attention anyway.) But eventually, I reached a large clearing.
So things are moving now, somewhat. Life-wise, a few windows are visible, and maybe a door or two will open for me.
But it takes action for things to actually move, and personally asking questions to know what the heck I’m looking at, let alone know what I’m doing…
And so, I am moving. Not moving out for good (as I should), but moving my feet, and throwing caution to the wind. Just a bit. …I managed to “capture” two of the blue flies I’ve seen hanging around the front yard, this fall…
The greens are out in full-swing— leaves, in particular.
The plant that comes up from underneath a porch railing has almost-full leaves now. It’s interesting how soft immature leaves are. I was able to capture them in focus a few days ago, but only after the use of a focal trick (passing my finger about the lens, forcing the smartphone camera’s auto-focus closer to the plant).
Such soft, hair-like edges… fibrous? (Click the image for the full detail.) The insects are on the case, looking for the carbs… but not in huge numbers.
It would be senseless, at this point, for the white stuff to fall, weather-wise. (Snow, I mean.)
…Now… You may have noticed that I have been at a loss for words lately, not to mention my lack of presence. …I assure you, I have been writing… in amounts big and small, here and there. But it’s been very slow. I have two drafts that are lacking the right touch. It’s been difficult— the writing coming out all muddled and… There’s so much material that just can’t be taken seriously.
Long story short, I’ve been kind of losing myself. Emotional exhaustion is a term that comes to mind trying to begin what I have to say of late. I’m not doing very well, not sleeping well… and well…
I’ll get back to posting, eventually. Maybe next year, at the rate things are going, lol. It’s already May 25, 2016. On that note, I guess I should say, have a good Memorial Day. 😀 I’ll get the beach photos up soon, I promise. …But first, I must sleep. Again. 😔 G’nite.