Today was… dull. Like a generalized mixture, a convergence of color on a macro scale; it revealed a sort of… lack of focus, or blind inclusion, to the point of no clear point. But I stretched my brain, stretching time into the morning. I exercised my fingers on the keyboard, and fell into catching up on a few things; without an effort searching, I found some good reading. But otherwise, there was lots and lots of silence, further marking my days as a involuntary loner.
It took a short while to get a good shot for the image above— back and forth; the camera and its software desaturates the darker areas, rendering pine trees gray. …Desaturating the day further, it began to snow.
Big puffy clusters of flash-frozen H20 fell from above, partially covering the immediate landscape. I held out my left hand to be sure it was the kind of precipitation I thought it was; one, two puffs of snow melted on my somewhat calloused left palm— hardened from resting my weight on my hands over the course of years of sorting files and reading.
The ground whitened in an hour. Somehow the leafless path was mostly bare when I returned outside after eight at night. Outside, the precipitation became rain, considering it hit the ground audibly. The temperature was above freezing (37°F at 10:52 p.m.), the gutters actively passing runoff.
Despite the pain of a medical condition, I managed to complete my walk time for the day. But the dullness remains. I find myself again responding to the uneventful hours by staying up well into the morning, expending energy without gain. I have every reason to be tired, and I am. But I push on, present when no one else is… The curse of a longing and insecure free will.